How in the world can someone forget the special occasion being celebrated today when everything u see on tv and every newspaper reminds you that today is supposed to be a day for fathers. Almost the whole day ive been thinking how else can I express my appreciation to someone whos no longer with us. So I decided that maybe thru this blog, I can hopefully express my gratitude to a man who gave me life. Because to me, its more than enough….Pa,
Thank you…. Two important words I wasn’t able to tell you before you passed away. Im saying these words now with all sincerity. Thank you. Thank you Pa.
Thank U for the times when u had to carry me on your shoulders when I was crying out so loud outside the bathroom the nite you were supposed to leave for Cebu for work, and assuring me you will come back for us in a few days……
Thank U for the bruises I got on my legs from your ultra thick belt, everytime u wana discipline me, for it prepared me for the pains I have and will go thru in life. …
Thank U for telling mama one night while having dinner that you wanted me to go to the best university in college. Made me realize how much you believed in me…
Thank U for being a good provider to the family. we may not be wealthy but you made sure we are provided with all the basic necessities in life. it taught me that i do not need to have everything in life and to work hard for the things i want...
Thank U for respecting our differences. We might not have the same religion and beliefs, but u allowed me and mom to just follow our heart. This made me conscious of the reality of God. That is, you made me believe there was a God.
Pa, we might not have the ideal father-son relationship, you might not have been the perfect father and I might not have been your perfect son, but I want you to know that in your silence, you have my highest respects. Thank U for your continuous guidance. I want you to be proud of my small acheievements. Most of all, i want you to be proud of who i have become.
I will end this “tribute” by saying I have, in my life time, met and known many fine fathers, and have read about many great men , yet, I can truthfully say I am glad I am your son, Papa.
Happy Fathers’ Day wherever you are Pa.
--Jerry
p.s. my papa passed away (@ age 72) sometime 1995 due to lung cancer. And the biggest pain any child can feel was that in his deathbed, he could not seem to recognize me anymore…til he passed away one early mornin….
8 comments:
Good one, Jerry.
Honest and hits the spot. I had the same experience with my dad. He died of pancreatic cancer a couple of years ago. Being the one with a background in medicine, I was the one pushing the morphine until his last breath. I witnessed all his delirium and heard all the babble that went with it. I never cried for him when he died, not even during the funeral. I was happy he was finally relieved of the pain and I could throw the damn morphine syringes away. I cried more for my mom seeing her weep, but not for my dad dying.
The next thing I know, I got something that he passed on to me. =P
ey rob. thanks for checkin this out. im just curious what was that thing ur dad passed on to u? =P
anyhow, we all go thru those experiences in life. it should make us appreciate the people around us more......
catch more of u here rob =)
hey jerry...
nice letter to your dad...
it struck a nerve on my end...
i find it hard to be open to my dad (and w/ my mom)... i just feel that if i tell stuff about him in my life... things that he doesnt know, it will add to more disappointments...
i dont know, but i have this feeling as if ive been one big disappointment to them...
but even though, after everything that ive done, i can still feel that my dad cares...
though sometimes i wished he'd show it physically (we're not that much of a hug-and-i-love-you-type of people)...
* sigh *
* makes me wonder about how to improve my relationship with my dad *
thx for the visit mon. i understand where ur comin from but know what, we dont have a perfect family as well. who has? and we are not the demonstrative type as well. but somehow there are just ways of showing our parents how we appreciate everythin theyve done- by being a good son, giving them back whats due for them,and making them proud of whatever small achievements u have. u can take small steps to improve ur rel with them. just consider urself lucky bec u stl have every single chance to make them feel loved and appreciated, while theyre still here. =)
true true true... =P
short and sweet wentle =P thx for droppin by =>
Dad passed away almost 4 yrs ago. He was about to be checked out from the hospital after a routine exam. Then the unthinkable happened when mum left to settle the bills.
When she got back to the room, dad had already expired. I on the other hand, arrived too late.
One comforting feeling was that I knew that he was no longer in pain. I guess it was also a blessing that he didn't have to know about my being gay. It would be more painful for me to be the cause of his death, and seriously, that would be something I cannot live with.
We didn't have the best of relationships as well, but I know that in my heart, I spent almost all of my Sundays with mum and dad just to hang out with them because they deserve to be treated with such love. :)
orange76: we all have our sad stories to tell. but then again, its how we get up from those experiences and the important lessons we learned along the way that truly matters. the deaths of our loved ones shouldnt stop us from becoming who we want to be. we can continue making them proud. theyre just watching us from up above =)thx for sharin ian!
Post a Comment